GETTING STARTED
How do I get started navigating round the site?
The site is organised according to a main navigation bar and a submenu system.
The Main Navigation Bar is the at the top of the screen. The colour depends on
which version of our site you are looking at. It has the words
Home
Pay Profile People
Search Messages
Options Help
Clubs+Events Forums
This is your constant source of reference throughout our
site. Each of these words is a hyperlink to a main section of the site.
When you click on one of these hyperlinks - e.g.
Search - you will be taken to that section and
the page title and submenu (under the menu) and quicklinks (in left hand margin
of the page) will change.
For example - the above picture shows you the Search
page of the site. The submenu options shown include
Detailed Search
.
The site is designed so everything is no more than 2 clicks away. The
site is very easy to navigate if you think logically>>> FIRST
you choose the relevant hyperlink on the main navigation bar SECOND you choose
the relevant submenu option or quicklink icon. Simple - just 2 clicks! Say you
wanted to see all messages you have sent >>>
First think 'Message' Hmmm... that is probably
on
Messages (from Main Navigation Bar )
Second press Messages
Sent
We suggest you have a cruise round he site
- clicking on all the items on the Main Navigation Bar to see what
you can do on each page.
Is my Browser (e.g. AOL's browser)
compatible with the site? The site is designed to run on Internet
Explorer (v5 and higher) and Netscape Navigator (v5 and higher).
There may be issues with other browsers (Opera, AOL's inbuilt browser)
that means our site doesn't work properly with other
browsers. We're really sorry but we cannot guarantee functionality
with other browsers - it takes all our resources to keep
our Explorer/Navigator compatibility up to speed.
Explorer/Navigator account for 95% of the browser market and are free
to download.
We know that there are issues with AOL's inbuilt browser not storing
our cookies correctly that means AOL users need to use Internet Explorer
(or Navigator) instead. Of course you still connect to the net via AOL -
you just use Internet Explorer once you're connected.
You can download Internet Explorer from
www.microsoft.com or Firefox from
www.firefox.com
>>>We really recommend Firefox
browser
SEARCHING
How do I start
searching for members?
Press
Search on the main menu and you will be
taken to the Speedy Search Page.
From
the final option that says 'Show me' you can choose whether to
see mini profiles or gallery view.
Each time you carry out a search the search page
automatically remembers what criteria values you entered. This means if
you leave the page and return to it later (even if you also leave our
site) you don't have to have to set up all the search criteria again.
I want to do a more detailed
search - what options are there?
To do a more
detailed search go to
Search (main menu) followed by either
Matching
Serach
or Detailed Search
Detailed Search is good for
pinpointing an exact type of person
Go to ' Search' on the main menu then press the
Detailed Search icon. You
can now search for precise values on all searchable fields.
Detailed
search doesn't allow you to have as many combinations as a
Matching Search but it includes more fields to choose from and can be
quicker. If you want to look for a 6ft tall Buddhist with red hair living in
Wales...good luck!
Note the instructions on the page for Geographical searching.
...especially how the fields are 'ORed' together.
If you want someone just in Cambridgeshire
do not put anything else in any of the other location boxes i.e do not put
'UK' in the Country box or 'East' in the Region Box'
Yes, we know Cambridgeshire is in the East of the UK
HOWEVER, this is the equivalent of telling the computer Cambridgeshire OR
UK OR East. i.e. any of the 3 are OK. So you will get everyone in the UK -
from Land's End to John O'Groats

Matching Search is good for
combinations of criteria
Your matching criteria can include
pretty much unlimited combinations of values on the most common searchable
fields. e.g. you can specify Occasional Smoker OR Non Smoker (thereby just
ruling out smokers) AND pHd OR Degree AND...etc., etc.
If you make your matching search too complex it will be slow - so please leave
categories set to 'Not bothered about this' where this is the case.
What's all
this about Matching Criteria?
These are
powerful features and are set from
Profile (main menu)
then 'My Matching' and/or
Search (main menu) then
Matching Search
Open to
meet defines your minimum requirement for a partner - so don't be too
picky with this. You can be a bit choosier with Ideal Match. Once
you've set your criteria up other members can view these from your
profile. The idea of this is so that members don't waste time messaging
other members where there is some major incompatibility.
There are a few common mistakes made on these pages that mean your
criteria are not as you would want them...
Mistake1. Ticking the 'Use this Criteria' checkbox then ticking ALL the
checkboxes
 >>>NO!
>>>Including every combination is the same as saying
I'm not bothered about hair - however it gives our computer a hard time.
So you should just leave the 'hair' option looking like the following (to
do this uncheck the 'Use this criteria' box next to 'Hair Colour')
 >>>YES!
...better!
Mistake2. Ticking the 'Use this Criteria'
checkbox then ticking NONE of the checkboxes
 >>>NO!
>>>This will eliminate everyone from the results!
Mistake3. ONLY checking the 'Not Relevant' checkbox is nearly always a bad
idea.
 >>>NO!
>>>You are not saying in the above example that hair
isn't relevant for you. You are saying that you are only
interested in people who have answered the hair question as 'Not
Relevant'. Most people are happy to state what sort of hair they have.
Only a minority refuse to do this and state 'Not relevant'. Specifying the
above means you rule out all the blonde, brown, black, auburn etc. people
who have stated their hair colour (this amounts to most people!)
This is what your search should look like if you
aren't bothered about hair >>>
>>>YES!
This is what your search should look like if you
just don't want to meet bald people (not that we're encouraging this
discrimination) but otherwise aren't bothered >>>
 >>>YES!
4. Age and Height Mistakes
If you tick either of these criteria make sure you set sensible values
(do not leave as default values). There is no point saying 'Use this
criteria' (for age or height) then not setting values as below>>>
>>>
NO!
Much better is one of the following>>>
>>>
YES!
...if you're not bothered
>>>
YES!
...if you are bothered (and want to meet 27-37 year
olds)
MESSAGES
How do I know if someone has sent me a
message?
The message will be forwarded to the email address you
gave when you filled in your profile. Don't worry, the person who sent the
message can't see this address! Also when you log in you can check
your
Messages received from the Messages page.
You can change the address to which email is
forwarded on page 1 of your profile. See "How do I edit my own
profile?"
How do I send someone a message?
Press the
shortcut button (left hand menu) from the person's profile or
mini-profile. Alternatively, in Gallery Search Results view there is a text
hyperlink under each member. Any of these will take you to the
to the 'Send Message' page.
How do I know if my message has been sent?
When you send someone a message it is logged in our
system and we try to send a notification email straight away. You should
see a confirmation message telling you that the message has been logged
and an email sent. If you do not wait for the confirmation message e.g. if
you are impatient and decide to go to another part of the site - then you
can't be sure that your message has been correctly processed!
If it takes a long time to display your message
confirmation then this usually means we are having problems with the
member's mailserver.
Occasionally problems with the member's
mailserver mean we can't deliver the notification email at that point in
time. Your confirmation message will tell you this. In this case the
message is still logged on our system and we try to deliver the email
later. So don't keep pressing 'Back' on your browser and sending it again
as this will queue up many copies of the same message.
If you go to
Messages (main menu) then
Messages Sent
and you can
see your message it has been logged OK and the recipient can also access
it. There is no need to send the message again.
How do I know if someone has read
my message?
Use our "Read Receipt" feature on the
Send Message
page. This sends an email alert to the person but not your message itself,
thereby forcing them to visit the site to read your message. Once they do
this you'll see a tick next to the message on your
Messages Received Page. You should also be sent an email telling you
of this.
Of course not sending a copy of your message via email is less
convenient for the recipient - so use this feature with discretion.
How do I verify my email address?
When you first joined our computer automatically emailed you a
registration email. You simply click on the email validation link and you
should be taken to our site and all this sorted automatically.
If this doesn't work note the validation code
given on your registration email and go to '
Options' (main menu) then
Email Settings (side menu) where you can enter it manually.
If the email never arrived go to
Profile (main menu) then '1.Private
Info' where you can request another registration email to be sent or
correct your email address if you entered it incorrectly.
PROFILE
How do I look up someone's profile?
Press
Search on the main menu then press the
' Search
by Username' button. Now enter the Username of the person whose details
you would like to see.
What do the badges on top of members' profiles
mean?
  
These are the member's 'Credentials':
'Email OK'
Badge = member has verified their email address - so you can
be assured any messages you send will be received by them via their email.
'Full Member' Badge = member is a Full
member. Full members (having paid something) are often more likely to take
the site seriously (respond to emails) than free members.
'ID Checked' Badge = member has
been in to see us for an ID check - so we've seen some proof they are who
they say they are and where they live. Guys aren't usually bothered about women being ID checked. It
is more a feature requested by typically 40+ women and women new to internet dating.
How do I edit my own
profile?
Press
Profile on the main menu then choose which page of your
profile you would like to edit. Make sure you press 'Save and Proceed' to
save changes.
How do I change my email
address?
Press 'Profile' on the main menu then press '1. Private Info'
How do I change my
password?
Press
Profile on the main menu then press '1.
Private Info'
How do I change my Username?
Press
Profile on the main menu then
the 'Change Username' icon on the submenu. Only for full
members!
PHOTOS
How do I add my photo?
Members have the facility to upload your own photos to our
website. Press
Profile from the main menu then press
the
Upload
Photo option on
submenu where full instructions are given.
You can also email or snailmail (post) a photo
in to us and we'll sort it out for you - details are given on the
MY MAIN
PHOTO page.
What else can
I do with Photos?
Members can upload more than one photo - press
Profile (on the main menu)
then
Upload New Photo. Members can show, hide or delete your own photos and
add captions to them.
- Your main photo is
administered from Profile then MY MAIN PHOTO
- Your other photos are administered from
Profile then All my
Photos
- Full instructions are given on these pages.
FULL members have loads of extra facilities to do with Photos that Free
members don't have, they can:
- display all their photos to
everyone
- instantly
publish their photos (Free members have to wait
for their photo to be approved by a member of staff which can take some time)
- upload a greater number of photos
- have a 'private' photo that is not on public view that can be sent to other
members
Can I send someone my photo without having to
display it publicly?
Yes! First upload your photo as explained in 'How do I add my Photo?'.
Next hide your photo. Go to
Profile then All my Photos
and tick the relevant 'hide photo' checkbox then press 'Action'. Now
although you can still see your photo it is not displayed on your profile
or in searches - i.e. it is hidden.
Then when you want to show
someone your 'hidden' photo you should tick the Photo button when sending a
message to that person.
FULL V FREE MEMBERSHIP
Why bother upgrading?
Full members have unlimited messaging - messaging for free
members is restricted
Full members have access to a load of
features that free members don't.
Full members keep us in a job - so we orientate the whole site for them.
Our motto is 'Full members have more dates an more fun'. Whilst we cannot
guarantee you more dates we do everything possible to bring this about -
promoting full members in Search results, etc.
Checkout the
Pay page for full
details of this - go on!
Will my free membership expire and my profile be
deleted??
Don't worry - we've no plans to do this!.
Your profile is very comprehensive and takes quite a while to fill
out so it wouldn't be fair to get you to do this then delete you just
because your full membership expired.
However, If you don't use our site for absolutely ages (several months)
then we may archive and eventually delete your details to save space. We'd
try to email you notification and give you plenty of time to reactivate
your account before this happened, though.
I'm a free member - will you sell on my email
to other companies?
There are 3 answers to this. No, no and no! We hate spam mail too. Even
if you are too poor/mean/whatever to pay up and become a Full member we
will treat your private details (e.g. email) with the same respect.
Are your memberships
subscriptions i.e. auto-rebilling?
1 month and 3 month = YES, 1 year = no. This is
really clearly stated on the
Pay page
- before, during and after
you pay.
How do I cancel my
subscription?
Easy - go to the
Pay page and press button at bottom of
the form. You can cancel at any time during your membership - even 5 mins
after signing up. When you cancel your membership will continue as a full
member for the paid-for period then will revert to a free member
Can I have a
refund?
We have a no-refund policy in our Terms and Conditions which all members
must agree to before joining. We also don't know of any dating sites that
offer refunds - so it's not just us being mean.
If we're at fault
and screwed up in some significant way then we'll happily give you a
refund e.g. we accidentally deleted your messages or you requested
cancelling your subscription and we were late doing it (happens very
rarely). No problem - we're at fault have your money back and an
apology.
However for other things like
"No one contacted me" ...you're supposed to be
proactive and send messages to other members not just wait to be
emailed
"I haven't used the site"" or I forgot about my
subscription" ...well that's not our fault.
We are usually happy to extend your membership or
let you transfer it to a friend, though.
MEMBERSHIP
OPTIONS
I need a break - how can I put stop appearing on the site
for a while?
Go 'on hold' - see below...
How do I put my membership on hold?
Whilst 'on hold' you will not show up in search
results and members cannot look at your profile. You can stay on hold for
as long as you like. Members typically go on hold if they are busy, going
on a long holiday or have met someone who they like and don't want any new
introductions.
Press
Options on the main menu then press the
Suspend/Reactivate/Terminate button. Now choose what you wish to do. If you have
good news or feedback - we'd love to hear it and a form is provided on
this page.
It's up to you whether you still wish to keep email
forwarding open. You may wish to do this if you are expecting email from
people you have previously made contact with. If you decide to block email
then anyone that tries to send a message will be notified that you are on
hold and are not receiving emails.
Passive: removes you from most search lists
but people can still message you. Passive = a good idea if you're
inundated with too many messages.
Note for free members: Full
members can choose to look at (+contact) Free members who are passive if
they wish to. Also you can still be included in Yes-No-Maybe system. If
you want a more private/'pick and choose' membership
then you need to both
upgrade and go 'Passive'.
On Hold: removes you from search lists and
stops messages: Good if you've met someone but not quite ready to delete
your profile.
Works exactly the same if
you are a free or full member.
How do I opt
out of email newsletter and other emailings?
Log in, press
Options on the main menu then press the
Email
Settings
button. There is an option to opt out of our email newsletter
and other emailings on this page.
This is easy to do, so we really appreciate if members to do this rather than
emailing us saying 'UNSUBSCRIBE' (or similar) and expect us to sort this
out. Also, you need your password
to log in to our site, which gives you a safeguard against people
tampering with your account. If you can't log in then please explain on an
email to us why this is and we'll happily go to the trouble of sorting
this out and stopping any unwanted emails.
How do I
permanently terminate my membership?
Firstly, are you sure it wouldn't be
better to just go 'on hold'?
If you're on hold then people can't see your
details or send you email. However, you can re-activate whenever you wish.
If you terminate your membership then all your profile details are
permanently erased.
To terminate your membership press
Options
on the main menu then press
Suspend/Reactivate/Terminate
option. Now confirm in the text box that you want your membership
terminated and press the button at the bottom of the screen.
How do I adjust other settings
of my account? e.g. Privacy, Email stuff, etc.
Go to
Options on the main menu and have a look
round. We've included lots of options so you can fine tune your account to
how you want it to work. For example you can decide if it's:
-
OK to receive HTML email
-
OK to receive members' messages via email
-
OK to receive messages from matchmaking consultants
Email Newsletter:
-
OK to receive Newsletter
-
OK for non members to see my profile
-
OK for members to send my mini profile to friends
What
are 'Favourite' members?
These are members who you have tagged whilst looking
at their profiles. We include this facility because it's useful to browse
through search results and mark members you are interested in then easily
revisit these members' details later.
To add someone
to you 'Favourites' list simply press
the +Favourites
button on their profile.
To review your favourites press the
View Favourites
button on the Home page. From your Favourites list you can easily send
messages to selected members or delete them from your list.
TROUBLESHOOTING
I've forgotten my password
On the login screen press the link for "Forgotten your password?" and
you can have your password reminder displayed or your password emailed to
you. Make sure you haven't accidentally put CAPS LOCK on. If there is
still a problem then email us from the email address that you specified
when you joined up quoting your username.
The site doesn't work / I can't log in
Over 90% or people that report that our site "is not working" turn out
to have a problem with their ISP or with their browser. So,
1. Make sure that you can access other Internet sites OK. Go to Google
and do a search - if it works your Internet Connection is OK.
2. Make sure your browser accepts 'cookies' - these are an essential
part of the security of our site. On Internet Explorer you set cookies
by going to 'Tools' menu, then 'Options' then the 'Privacy' Tab. We
suggest you specify our website URL as a 'trusted' site. Alternatively,
decrease the 'privacy' setting to the minimum and all cookies will be
accepted. Note 'Privacy' is different to 'Security' - we do
not recommend you decrease your 'Security Settings'
3. Make sure you have a relatively up to date browser (e.g. Firefox or Internet
Explorer). You can download new versions for free from
http://www.microsoft.com/ie
or
www.firefox.com.(Recommended)
>>>We really recommend FIREFOX - it is free, secure and
easy to use. We all use Firefox in our office
If still a problem then remember to state explicitly
on your email exactly what happens when you try to log in
and exactly
what the error message is
I'm a FULL member - but still showing as a Free
member - Why?!!
This can occasionally happen to people that have a problem with their
browser. Usually it's a 'caching' issue whereby your browser is -
incorrectly - retrieving some old pages from your local computer's
hard drive that you once viewed when a free member as opposed to going to
our site for fresh pages every time as it should.
To fix this on Internet Explorer so that your browser always checks for
new pages as it should:
- Go to the 'Tools' menu of Internet Explorer* then select 'Internet
Options'
- In the middle of the dialog box that pops up there is a section for
'Temporary Internet Files' - select the button for 'Settings' and a
sub-dialog box opens
Your browser is now purged of all old pages and will definitely check
for new pages when you visit the site. Browsers should 'automatically' do
this anyway but automatic detection of new pages doesn't always work in
practice for everyone.
Make sure you next log in from the main
entrance to the site
NOT from any other links on emails or
your favourites.
*If you've an older version of Internet Explorer then look for something called
'Options' as opposed to 'Internet Options'. If you're on an old version
of Navigator look for 'Preferences' then the setting for 'Temporary
Internet Files'.
If this doesn't work it may be that your browser is corrupted/flaky. We
suggest you reinstall/upgrade it. Don't worry - browsers are free:
www.firefox.com.(Recommended) or
http://www.microsoft.com/ie
My changes don't appear to be saved!!
This is nearly always down to "Caching"...
When you retrieve a page from the Internet your
browser usually checks your hard drive to see if you've loaded this page
before. If so it retrieves the page from your hard drive because it's
quicker than getting a fresh copy from the Internet.
The problem with caching is if the page has changed
since the last time you viewed it - you may end up being shown an outdated
page from your hard drive if your browser does not check for updates. Your
browser may be setup not to check for updates - to establish this on
Internet Explorer...
'Tools' menu, select 'Internet Options' then in the
Temporary Internet Files section select 'Settings' and make sure it is set
to 'Automatic' or 'Every visit to a page'
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